Sunday, October 4, 2009

Hardly Davidson @ Bikefest 09

We entered our bike at the '09 Bikefest this past Saturday. I'll tell you now what I knew prior to my ol' man deciding to put our bike into the contest: we weren't gonna win. WHY? Well, basically because 'bikefest' is just a giant porno-mag for motorcyclists, and anything that ISN'T a Harley isn't gonna give them a boner. The judges for the bike show were the whores pimped out by EasyRider and other 'biker' magazines. You can rest assured that none of them could've voted for anything other than a HD without a bunch of their readers screaming to get their money back and their subscriptions halted.

They've decided beforehand that Harleys are the shit and every other bike is......NOT. It's quite evident when you go into the vendor village area and run into decals of the little boy pissing on the logos of every other bike (Yamaha, Suzuki, etc.).

Let's not go into the fact that Harley Davidsons aren't even any more AMERICAN motorcycles than a Yamaha is. Yamaha parts come from Japan and are assembled in Oklahoma. Harley parts come from CHINA and are assembled in Milwaukee. They don't wanna bring that up because it would blow their whole 'AMERICA...FUCK YEAH' thing out of the water.

There's also a lot of Obama hatred going on in these sorts of things. I kind of expected that, being as the average 'hardcore' biker isn't really that up on facts and probably watches a lot of FOX news (which is as much news as the stork is where babies come from).

Try to get a drink or something to eat at Bikefest and be ready to pull out your credit card. We had 2 inedible pork sandwiches for $7.50 EACH. Wound up demanding our money back...and got it. Bottled waters went for $2.50 and sodas for $3.00. Want a hot dog? $4.00. Fucking unreal.

This isn't the first Bikefest I've been to, but it most likely will be my last. It takes advantage of everything bikers and even casual bike riders hold sacred. Plays us like little money-filled pawns and laughs all the way to the bank.